I just got a hair up my ass and decided that I just might open up my old myspace layout site, and maybe actually promote it and shit. And make layouts.

GASP!

I don’t know when I lost complete grasp of you. I always believed that we ended up together for a reason. You were gonna help me and I was gonna help you. You are the complete opposite of me. You know everything about everything down to the tiniest detail. You are so outgoing, you will talk to a complete stranger. You will ask anyone for help. You understand my feelings. I feel like you know me to my core. You were so perfect for me.

Had I known where we were going to end up, I would have done things so much differently. I’m sure you’ve heard that many times, and even worse, it doesn’t fix a thing. The damage here has been done.  While I know it will take me a long time to recover, I am terrified that you never will.

If your family knew what was happening to you, it would break their hearts. How could you ever do that to them? I am only one person who can only mean so much, but you are very blessed to have those people in your life. I would have loved so much to be a real part of that.

I say these things with all sadness and anger aside. I know that with time it will get easier and I will slowly accept it, but I will continue to have hope for you and I will keep our memories always.

Looks like things were rough. I never gave this to him. We didn’t last much longer anyhow.

I think I may have jumped the gun and got a BIT too excited about this tax return stuff after getting the paperwork to file on my student loans (I paid them off). I’m now super confused. I realized I don’t have any idea what’s going on or how much I’ll get back. I know I’ll have to get something back on the house because when signing at closing 4 different people mentioned it. I’m just not sure, none of this shit makes sense.

I will just have to stop thinking about it until I have the rest of my papers and every thing’s filed. That will be impossible though.

For the past year and some odd months I’ve spent the last hour and a half of my workday counting down the minutes until 5:30. This is usually when I am free to leave, so long as nothing else needs to be done. Friday they informed me that I now have to stay until 6:00 every day, and so far it’s really ruining my afternoons. Four o’clock is no longer such a victory, more like a death sentence. GOD TWO MORE HOURS?

Life sucks (and then you die).

Don’t offer to get drinks from Starbucks for everyone in the office when you have NO WORKING CUPHOLDERS.

That was almost a disaster.

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Now playing: Modest Mouse - March Into The Sea
via FoxyTunes

  I haven’t had much to say lately. Life’s been pretty much the same ole shit on a different day, which is incredibely annoying if I say so myself.

I am so damn anxious to get my income taxes done, I’m waiting on a pretty big lump of money that would really help me out right now. I’ve decied to allow myself one big purchase and so far I’ve narrowed it down to replacing my XTi, a Wii, or a Blackberry Curve. All very different in price I know but I’m leaning toward replacing the camera at this point. I miss it a lot, and even though I didn’t use it as much as I should, now that I no longer have it I can see myself getting one and using it a lot more. It was a great thing to have, something I really appreciated and took care of like it was my child. How dare he.

I also really really want to get into making resin jewelry. I see some awesome pieces over on etsy and it can’t be that hard. I can see myself making some sweet shit, haha. Plus it will be nice to have a little hobby like that, one that could possibly make a lil bit of money on the side. I also want to get more into knitting, maybe learn more instead of just knowing the basics, like extreme basics. I found a great website though with video tutorials so perhaps I can advance a bit.

Bleh, I feel bloated and icky. Plus I’m just THRILLED that it’s Monday.

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Now playing: Mat Weddle - Hey ya acoustic cover
via FoxyTunes

Paul stole my digital SLR. I’m not getting out of bed for a week.

I called him up and went off real good. I knew it wouldn’t make any bit of difference, but I just wanted it to be clear to him that I never want to see or speak to him ever. again.

I found a new plugin to play an mp3 in a post (thanks Allyson!), so I’m really just testing out the plugin but this is my favorite song on In Rainbows by Radiohead.